Homesteading and Survivalism

Living a simple life

Tag: divorce

Where Do You Find Your Happiness

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Happiness, what is it, where does it come from and where can it be found.  I turn 49 years old in 2017.  As I look back there have been various times when I was happy.  I can look back at the 1990s and think of times when I was happy, and a lot of times when I was not happy.

There have been times when I was very happy with a job.  Such as when I worked at various welding shops in Southeast Texas.  Some of them were good to work for, some were terrible.

The worst kind of happiness is that which depends upon others.

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Single at 47 faded dreams of love

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Something happened that I would never in a million years thought could come true, my beloved Kristy and I divorced.

We met in 2000 while I was working at Lake Conroe between Conroe and Montgomery. After a whirlwind romance we got married and swore our love to each other.

On July 17 2015 Kristy and I got into an argument. I asked if she wanted a divorce. She said yes and left. A few days later she filed for divorce.

The love of my life that I hoped to live the rest of my days with is no longer by my side.

I feel so empty inside as if my heart and soul were ripped out, shredded, and burned. My hopes of ever finding someone to grown old with has been destroyed.

Kristy and I built a life together and had so many plans. Plans that seemed to vanish in a split second when she drove away.

Now I have to start a new phase of life of being single at 47 years old. Just when life was getting good for Kristy and I she left and we are divorced. I finished paying child support in 2014. We both found good paying jobs with good benefits. Then all of a sudden the rug is pulled out.

Going on 3 months after she left and I am numb and still in denial. Everyday I hope she contacts me to say she is coming home. I know my hopes are in vain.

My next relationships will be filled with mistrust. How can I love someone else when the love of my life walked out? This feels like a bad dream I wish so badly to awake from.

I just want to wake up to find Kristy sleeping next to me.

Starting a new phase in life

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I feel like I am starting a new phase in life. Here I am at 46 years old (almost 47), finished paying my child support almost a year ago and starting a new career. Is this how life is supposed to work?

When I finished high school in 1986 my fiance’s grandfather helped me get a job at a welding shop in southeast Texas.  The pay was pretty bad, but at least I was learning something.  From 1986 – 1999 I bounced around various welding shops hoping the pay and benefits would get better, but they never did.

1995 I went to Lamar College in Port Arthur for a degree in computer information systems.  Working a full time job, being a parent, being a husband and going to college takes dedication.

1999 – 2000 my life fell apart.  I lost my job due to the company making poor decisions.  It sure is funny how the CEO make make terrible decisions and everyone else has to pay the price.  Then in 2000 my wife of 14 years filed for divorce.  In all honesty I was tired of her screaming, fit-throwing and refusing to control her spending.  In the long run divorcing her was probably the best thing that happened to me.  But it would take years to make progress in my life.

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Why Are Some People Full Of Rage

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Dealing with the ex-wife again, this time its over a gun she claimed came up missing during the divorce.

What really happened, some people lack a single decent level of respect for other people.

Its simply amazing how someone can warp reality to believe what they want.

This world would be a better place if people would respect others. Is a little respect too much to ask? For some people, yea, asking for respect is a little too much to ask for.

The question I ask, why do people have to act that way? Is it a mental disease, too much lead in the water, genetics, mom do too many drugs while she was pregnant,,,, or something else?

What causes certain people to have a lack (or no) empathy for those around them?

Maybe its a survival thing left over from our primal existence? To survive the ice ages, maybe some people stole from others, instead of working as a team for the betterment of the community.

Does selfishness reach no end?

During the housing collapse of 2008 I think we say a good example of selfishness and a lack of empathy. To the money lenders, people were a loan number and nothing more.

Some people take their actions past empathy, and into a field of hatred.

What makes someone so angry that they lash out at everyone around them? There is no talking, there is nothing but screaming and pure rage.

How can someone live in a constant state of rage?

Most people get mad, then calm down a little while later. But there are some people who never seem to clam down, its as if their life is ruled by rage and screaming fits. How can people live like that?

Maybe its a lack of team spirit? That the people think its them against the world? Maybe they think the world is theirs for the taking? Those other people out there are just in the way and are to be brushed to the side like insects.

Isn’t charity and empathy some of the features that make us human? When we strip those away, what are we?

Turn about is fair play in divorce court

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There is an interesting article on the telegraph – female breadwinners are ‘losing out’ in divorce.

The article basically says what men have been saying for decades, the person with the lowest income comes out on the better end of the deal in a divorce.  In the case of that article, it is talking about working women coming out on the short end of the stick.

Oh boo hoo hoo, a woman has to pay her fair share in a divorce, why is that even news?

When the lazy wife does not want to get an education or go to work to bring more money into the family, society is just fine with men having to split things down the middle.

In other words, when men are getting the shaft, everything is fine and dandy.

When women get the shaft, something is terribly wrong.

Double standards suck.

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