Homesteading and Survivalism

Living a simple life

Tag: depression

Took a look in the mirror

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I took a long look in the mirror and did not like what I saw. What bothers me the most is how I have let myself go physically. Being overweight was never in my life plan. I never thought I would be out of shape and sitting at a desk job.

The sedentary lifestyle is one of the main reasons why I am looking for a new job. I am tired of sitting here.

In a way I am disgusted with myself. I put on so much weight and I feel like a pig.

Another reason I put on so much weight is I have a couple of beers before bedtime. The empty calories goes to the waistline.

Drinking was never in my life plan. I never drank when I was a teenager. I did not even drink in my early-20s. I did not start drinking until I was in my mid-20s. Why did I start drinking? I honestly do not know. What I do know is I regret the decision to start.

Drinking and weight gain was never in my life plans. When I was in my teenage years I wanted to live a clean lifestyle. My goal was to be smoking, tobacco, drinking and drug free. The only thing I stumbled on was the drinking. For about 2 weeks in high school I dipped, but I stopped when I realized I was getting addicted. I never smoked, not even once.

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Feeling down

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I am feeling really down. It seems like take 1 step forward, and then take 10 steps backwards.

For the past 4 – 5 months I have been looking for a new job. Only landed 1 interview. Went for a job interview, did not get the position. I have a proven employment history, skills, but yet nobody is calling.

One of the dogs I rescued killed one of my chickens last weekend, then mauled another one yesterday. My wife and I got the chicken, separated her from the flock, sprayed her wounds down with antibiotic spray and have her in a cage in the house. She will probably be ok. I have seen wounds like this before. There is a good chance she will recover. Chickens have a wonderful immune system.

Over the past few months I built a new 200 feet long x 100 feet wide chicken yard. The stupid chicken did not want to stay in its nice new yard, it got out, and the dog had its way with her. Just stay in your yard and you will be safe. But chickens do not understand that. Why did I put so much time and money into a new yard if the chickens are not going to stay in it?

To be honest, the two chickens that were getting out are Rhode Island Reds. The Buffs, Barred Rocks, Australorps and my only single remaining Black Jersey Giant are staying in the yard just fine. Barred Rocks love to free range, but they are not jumping over the fence. The Buff Orpingtons and Australorps are some of the easiest going chickens in my flock. They love to fee range, but will also stay in their yard.

It seems like no matter what I do something goes wrong.

Feeling down

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Feels like I am slipping underwater, lips barely breaking the surface to gasp for air.

I do not understand why I am feeling this way. Last summer my wife and I got moved to a rural area. We can finally live the lifestyle we want – have a garden, plant fruit trees, have chickens, live in peace and quiet, and for some reason I am feeling down.

There is so much I need to do, but so little time.

Need to build a rain water catch system to irrigate the garden, plant peas, beans, squash, melons, want to go fishing, build a larger chicken yard,,, feel overwhelmed.

The puppies are doing better and we have been going for walks in the evening.

We have a day of nice weather, then cloudy and overcast for a week. I feel that the cloudy weather has been affecting my mood.

I just want to enjoy life. But I feel that I have some kind of massive weight pulling me down. Why do I feel so down?

My wife and I are not in debt, child support will be over in a couple of months, everything is going good.

No More Newtowns

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There is an article on The Daily Beast talking about gun control. What I find interesting is the image used in the article.  Someone is holding up a sign that says “No More Newtowns”.  The O of no has an AR-15 with a red slash through it.

Its not the protestors, or the sign, or the article that amazes me.  What really gets to me is people not placing blame where it belongs, which is on the mentally ill who killed other people.Kevin Felts, blogger and survivalist

Why isn’t the nation debt receiving the same attention as gun violence?

Why isn’t free trade receiving as much attention as gun violence?

Why aren’t mentally ill people receiving as much attention as guns?

Why isn’t corporate crime receiving as much attention has gun control?

The simple answer is people need a scape goat for their problems.  Instead of addressing the complex issues, such as the state of mental health in America, lets just ban guns.

Instead of addressing our national debt, high unemployment rates, record number of people on welfare, bank bailouts,,, lets just ban certain types of guns.  For some reason banning the manufacturer and sale of AR-15s is going to magically fix the mental health and depression crisis in America?  Where does that kind of logic come from?

School shootings like Newtown and Columbine have to come to an end.  Liberals and progressives would have us believe restricting certain types of firearms is the answer.

Lets look at mass shootings like a math equation,

(mentally ill + access to guns) x defenseless people = tradegy

All we have to do is remove at least one part of the equation.

How life choices bite you in the butt

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When I decided to write this article I was having problems picking a title. Lately I have been doing some thinking. What promoted this was a comment posted on one of my post. The comment was in reference to some of my post sounding bitter.

I want to be honest with my readers, my poor life choices have led me on the path of bitterness.

Who is to blame for my life choices? I am.

Working in the welding field

In 1986 when I graduated high school I decided to enter the workforce instead of going to college. My wifes grandfather helped get me a job at a local welding shop. I should have known something was wrong when the company did not offer and kind of benefits, such as health insurance, or retirement.

In 1987 I got a job at another welding shop, but this job had lots of overtime and some benefits.

I should have know in 1987 that working in welding field was a dead end job. But I justified staying in the welding shops because I was making good money. In 1989 when I was 21 years old, I was bringing home anywhere from $500 – $1,000 a week. That was after insurance and taxes. I felt I was accomplishing something with my life.

Once again I overlooked the obvious. Working 80 hours a week when you are 21 years old is one thing. What was I supposed to do when I got into my 40s and 50s? Would I be able to do hard manual labor at 50 years old? What effects would steel working have on my body?

I blinded myself that welding companies treat employees like disposable products.

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Free Trade Will Kill The United States Economy

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With the advent of World War II America recovered from the greatest depression the US had ever seen.

With the advent of free trade, America will once again return to economic dark ages.

The engineers of free trade agreements said the jobs lost to cheap overseas labor will be replaced by high paying service sector jobs.

Service sector jobs do not “create” anything

Tech jobs design stuff, such as routers, switches and software, but we need working people to make those items.  Who is going to assemble the circuit boards?  How is going to install the circuit boards?

In other words, we need hands-on people to assemble those products.

We need ship builders, we need people to build bulldozers, build DVD players, make clothes,,,,. It is those jobs that support the middle class.

Is a financial analyst going to pour asphalt on the weekends?  How else are roads supposed to be built?  Someone has to operate the equipment.  Someone has to build the equipment that pours the asphalt.

What about the heat exchangers, cooling towers, pressure vessels, separation towers,,, are tech jobs going to build those items?

What do tech jobs add to the economy or infrastructure? Do tech jobs build drilling rigs? Do tech jobs drive trucks? Do tech jobs build our bridges? How about our roads? Do tech jobs build our roads and highways?

What about our pipelines? Do tech jobs dig the trenches, lay the pipes, weld the pipes, x-ray the welds, fill the trenches back in with dirt?

What about the refineries? Are tech jobs going to build and weld the columns, ladders, walkways,,,?

Are tech jobs going to build and install the pumps that make the refinery work?

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Two years of fatigue

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After falling ill In early September 2010, I have been fighting fatigue for 2 years.

Labor day 2010 my family and I went to the camp for the weekend.  I spent some time working on the shed, mowing, had a big cookout and spent some time with the family.

Tuesday after labor day weekend I started feeling bad.  I brushed it off as getting too hot in the 100 degree heat of the previous weekend.  By the end of Tuesday I was running a low grade fever of around 99 – 100.  Nausea set in Tuesday night.

By Thursday night / Friday morning my fever was up to 101 and would not break.  A little after midnight my wife rushed me to the local emergency room here in Jasper Texas.  I was admitted to the hospital Friday, and was released, Monday.

While at the hospital I was tested for all kinds of stuff – lyme disease, rocky mountain spotted fever, hepatitis, the flu,,, and dozens of other diseases, and every test came back negative.

Before I fell ill after labor day weekend I had been working out for almost 2 months.  I was getting in shape, losing weight and feeling great.

After I fell ill I did not have the energy to do anything.

Over the past two years I fell into a depression and put on a lot of weight.  Through most of my life I have been mindful of my weight and my level of physical fitness.  After that illness, I did not have the energy to do anything.

In the past few weeks I feel some of my old energy coming back, but just a little bit.

If the lack of energy was not enough, the weight gain and lack of exercise is playing havoc with my health.  I just wish I felt like I did before I got sick in September of 2010.

Save as much money as possible

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Weldbilt boat on the Angelina RiverAnd I do not mean for retirement (saving for retirement helps, but most of us are not there yet). From news about food prices going up 18.5% from January – September 2011, the Bank of America laying off 30,000 employees, to the new reports on credit card debt owed buy the average American,,,, I do not think we are going to pull out of this recession anytime soon.

The US government has spent so much money, that we will never be able to pay it off. Our great-grand children have been saddled with such a great tax burden, that there is no hope for the future generations.

This Bank of America is a troubling sign. Banks do not like to lose money. In fact there are all kinds of laws to protect banks from losing money. It was just a few months ago that the Federal government cut the banks a blank check, most of which went to performance bonuses.

If you judge the health of a nation but how stable its banks are, and one of the largest banks is laying people off, what does that say? It says the USA is in some deep crap.

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Posting stuff on the internet

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When you’re talking to someone in real life, words are like dust in the wind. But when you post stuff on the internet, its like etching your words in stone. The difference is, people can go back and read what you posted. Once your words are spread to the wind, they can not be retrieved, unless there was a recording.

A few days ago I started a thread about Hurricane Irene, the title of the thread was “Hurricane in the northeast, do you feel for them?”

I feel that I need to issue a public apology for that thread and my comments.

Disasters, lose of property and lose of life and nothing to take lightheartedly. These are serious issues, and my comments were out of line.

I apologize for my comments.

I have been though 2 hurricanes, and several tropical storms, so I know how it feels. After hurricane Ike passed through southeast Texas, my parents and the home I grew up in received 9 feet of storm surge. For over a year later I fought with depression and sadness. Its been almost 3 years, and I still get sad when I go to Bridge City.

The people in the Northeast have a rough road ahead of them. Recovery will take years – in both physical and physiological recovery. Roads can be rebuilt, trees can be removed, but feelings and memories take years to deal with. Some of the people that were affected by Irene may never recover, and that is one of the sadder facts.

After Hurricane Ike flooded Bridge City, an older couple that I know had to take their entire life savings and retirement to build a new house – because they did not have flood insurance.

Something I have learned over the years, when your wrong, your wrong, admit it and move forward.

What has happened over the past few days is a life lesson. Hopefully, I will not make the same mistake again, but I probably will.

Post your comments in this forum thread about my public apology.

Worse yet to come for US Markets

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angelina river jasper texasThink things are bad now?  Lets just wait a few more months.

The Federal Reserve is talking out printing more money out of thin air, think of post World War I Germany and hyper inflation.
Wheat prices approach a 22 month high, pushed up by failed wheat crops in Russia.
Banks not selling foreclosed homes – their hoping to hang onto the homes so that when the market improves, the homes can be dumped for a better price then the banks can get right now. This will cause home prices to drop even more, or to stagnate. Which is good for the average working people, maybe we will be able to buy a home then.
Wal-mart has rolled back its rollbacks.
Food prices have reached a 2 year high.
JP Morgan post third quarter 2010 net income of $4.4 Billion – for banks to be making money, that means other people are losing money.
China still have most favored nation trade status.
We still have the income tax.
The Federal Reserve is still in control of the American economy.
The 2 major parties still hold power over congress.
Companies in several states are being accused of foreclosure fraud.
Everything in that list is based off the bottom – the 2 major parties are still in power. If you want real change in this nation, your going to have to vote different, and that means voting for someone besides Democrat or Republican.

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Are you ready for the depression?

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The depression is just around the corner, are you and your family ready?  The news reporters are trying not to use the word “depression”, probably out of fear of the panic that will follow.

IMF predicts a global recession

The banking system, along with the US State and Federal governments have been the number one cause of this problem.

The banks started writing flexible mortgage rate loans – knowing that people would not be able to pay the notes.  But for some reason the people just played along with the scams.  Untold millions of families have lost their homes and driven into bankruptcy because of the greed of bankers.  The blame can not be placed solely on the bankers – the people HAVE to take part of the blame.

The State and Federal government have allowed millions of US jobs to be shipped over seas.  This is only at the benefit of the companies that are using cheap labor.  Since millions of people are out of work, less money is spent, in turn less tax dollars are brought in.

There is nothing “free” about “free trade” – someone pays the price.

The State and Federal government has also continued to take care of millions of illegal immigrants.  Untold millions of dollars are spent on the health and welfare of trespassers, when we can not even take care of our own.

A few weeks ago news was coming out of California that the sate was going to be hit with a money shortage.  The first thing that came to mind was – “how much money could be saved by taking the illegals off the social services programs?”  An illegal immigrant has no right to anything, expect to be arrested and sent back home.

Every 3 months Exxon reports record profits, and then the people wonder why gas and food is so expensive.

Human stupidity and greed have prevailed, and as a result, the depression is right around the corner.

Its time to get the plans in order.

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How to feed a family

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These days people are not only worried about this house note, or their electric bill, they are also worried about something much more basic – and that is food. There is hardly anything that grieves a mothers heart more, then to open a kitchen cabinet, and it be empty.

An economic report from February 2009 said that around 700,000 – 800,000 people lost their jobs in that one month. Less people have jobs, so less bills get paid. But the one thing that must be bought is food. But what if someone told you that you do not have to buy food? That you can grow your own.

Its true. Regardless of what people have been told for the past 30, 40 or 50 years, food does not come from a grocery store – it comes from the ground. At first I did not believe it. I honestly thought that the grocery stores used some kind of magic to make the food appear out of thin air.

We have been enslaved to the grocery store for decades. People have paid others to do their work for them. Its time to break those chains.

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